PLAYING SMART, BEING STUPID

One of the most stupidest thing I have done in my life was borrowing to pay loans. Not just borrowing, but borrowing with interest. It did not just destroy my image but nearly took my life, or should I say nearly led me to taking my life. Life is unfair really, but sometimes the things that happen to us are as a result of our own stupidity. Especially when we try to play smart, we put ourselves in situations that would be difficult to come out from and mine was no exception. Although the story of my suicide attempt wasn’t just about money or loans, they were the genesis of the whole problem, which let me to creating greater problems for myself. A lot of people will not be able to relate with this, before today I made the mistake it was hard for me to relate also, but after going through it I can say I understand a great deal why people borrow, and why they try to commit suicide.

Photo by Kier in Sight Archives on Unsplash

For me, the greatest mistake I made wasn’t even borrowing, it was trying to rush my growth. I was already indebted, but I was managing it and paying little by little. I had been indebted for a while because I had to borrow the money back then in school and it was now time to pay. Although the interest had risen significantly, I still managed to be able to cover it conveniently until I decided it was high time I scaled up. I had big dreams, in fact I still have big dreams, but I had a bad plan. I did not trust the process and it led me into dip shit.I wanted to scale up in my digital marketing profession. The course was really really expensive, in fact it was over my six months salary and I wanted to make it in one go of which borrowing was the only way. If I had not had any pending debt perhaps it would have been a good plan, but I did and It did not come without consequences.

At the end of the day I could not even use the money I borrowed to learn the course, it was as though as soon as I got the money trouble started. I only borrowed part of the money because I had a part, and after borrowing I lost the other part of the money due to a silly mistake (I transferred it to a wrong wallet). After that mistake the money I was supposed to use to clear debts that period went into something I can’t even remember again. Then I had to use the one I newly borrowed to clear debts and thus I was now in a circle of more debts while nursing a huge loss and not achieving my goal. Later on I discovered that a lot of things started falling apart and I became desperate, so desperate that I started gambling and that ultimately made me lose everything. It drove me into making lots of other mistakes that filled me with regrets and further led me to attempting suicide. Well it’s over now lol, but the injuries my decisions cost are still fresh in my heart.

THIS IS MY RESPONSE TO HIVE LEARNER'S
PROMPT FOR WEEK 198 EPISODE 3

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