Great Scot! Back From the Future.

I love an English pub. And I don’t just mean your modern day, half restaurant, half pub kind of pub. No. I mean your real English pub. The ones that have weird low ceilings made for people no taller than a Hobbit. The pubs with those odd rooms that have only two chairs and a table. Now that’s a real English pub!

Living in Nottingham, our standards are pretty high when it comes to a traditional English Boozer. What do you expect, when you live in a city that has the “Olde Trip To Jerusalem”, Englands oldest pub?!

Nottingham has more historic English pubs than you can shake a bag of pork scratching at and this is all the more reason to feature this particularly peculiar “pub” in this week’s #beersaturday.

Out with the olde and inn with the new?

While walking through an alleyway that connects Nottingham’ poshest shops with its poshest restaurants, I stumbled upon “The Tap House”. A quick glance inside suggested something different was going on here. No bar and only one member of staff who was standing by a cashiers desk by the door? “Curious”, I thought.

Walking through the door, I was greeted by the lady at the desk with a nice smile and a happy “hello”. The way in which she greeted me, I knew there was something else coming. It was the same kind of hello you get from one of those people who strap you into a rollercoaster before blasting you off into orbit. “Have you been to The Tap House before?”, she asked. And with that, I was certain I’d walked into something very different, and, quite possibly, something very dangerous…

As you can see, I was right to be worried for my safety.

Anyone who understands the English British culture of drinking alcohol will know that the barman/barmaid is not only a person who serves you your beloved ale, they’re also the last line of defence between you and your “evil twin”. You know, the one who falls through the door after midnight smelling of sin and hot sauce. Removing the bartender is like removing the brake pedal from a Ferrari Testarossa. It might be fun to begin with but it won’t end well!

Maybe this is the future of pubs to come. You walk in, get given a payment card, and then you’re let loose to ride every rollercoaster in the park as many times as you like! Sounds fun. Let’s give it a go.

With a total of 24 beers to choose from and the option to have as much or as little as you wish, The Tap House is a very entertaining place to be. Seductive I’d say. All this temptation and not a penny leaves your wallet until you leave the bar. It’s great that your bill is displayed on the screen as you pour your umpteenth beer of the day, but it’s all too easy to become disconnected to the digits rolling by. I imagine there have been some pretty surprising bills to pay at the end of the night. Alcohol and self control aren’t exactly great bedfellows if you know what I mean.

While I was there it was all very civilised and experimental. I’d like to go back for another try and see if they rotate the beer selection. The ones on offer were ok but nothing too exciting. It’s certainly not a pub in the traditional fashion and I can’t see anyone calling this their “local”. I imagine this would be a success in a country such as Japan, they seem to like automation. For me it was a little too insulated and lacked any real character. A novelty at best. Nothing wrong with that though. The world needs variety and if there’s one more place in the world that sells decent beer you can’t really grumble. The future of pubs? I hope not.

Long live the good old English pub!